Blaming God for Earthquake? Even Buddhists Do It

Here's a story I missed about the Japanese Earthquake. This happened back in March, right after the quake hit.

Although I don't share Shinto and Buddhist beliefs about karma and rebirth, I've always had a lot of respect for Eastern religions. They don't have a nasty penchant for proselytizing, and their ideas about sex and sexuality are quite reasonable. Best of all, they value learning.

But apparently they share at least one bit of craziness with evangelical nuts like Pat Roberson: a belief that human failings anger the deities that run this place, and that said deities get pissed and send earthquakes and hurricanes as punishment.

Tokyo Governor Shintaro Ishihara was the latest celebrity to make the awful assertion that the Japanese 9.0 earthquake is our fault. He said,

"We need a tsunami to wipe out egoism, which has rusted onto the mentality of Japanese over a long period of time. I think the disaster is a kind of divine punishment, although I feel sorry for disaster victims."

According to the story on ABC News, Governor Shintaro later apologized.

I hope Governor Shintaro realizes the company he is now keeping. He is in league with

Pat Robertson, Why Have You Forsaken Us?

Pat, Pat, where are you in our time of need? There's been a huge earthquake in Chile, and we can't figure out why! What is God's plan in this? What did those Chileans do to deserve God's wrath? How are we to know who to blame without your words of wisdom, Pat? You're letting us down! Your sage and godly explanation of the Haitian earthquake was so satisfying. It made us feel better!

We're so worried out here in California – are we due for another Big Earthquake? When we heard about Haiti, it was scary. But then you explained about their pact with the devil, and we knew we were safe because we didn't do anything dumb like that.

But what about Chile? Maybe they tried to let gays get married or something, just like we did! Please, Pat, can you talk to God again and find out what the story is down there in Chile? And let us know, as soon as you can. We're worried sick!

NOT!

But there IS a fascinating story here: Another blogger published a satirical news release claiming that Pat Robertson did exactly that (blamed the Chilean earthquake on their worship of an ancient demon) and thousands of people believed it. Robertson has been so outrageous in the past that the readers read the false news and just said, "Oh, there he goes again!" He's made a fool of himself so many times that we don't even blink when he does it again.

James The Mysterioso Predicts... Pat Roberson will...

I have great psychic powers ... something is coming to me ... yes, I can see it now, my crystal ball is clearing ... What's this? Why, it looks like an evangelical Christian, talking on TV. Why, it's Pat Robertson, and ... the words aren't clear ... Wait, the great Mysterioso James hears his words! He's saying that the Magnitude 8.8 earthquake in Chile is God's punishment! For sin!

No, it's even worse, God has spoken, personally, to Pat Roberson! It seems God wanted Pat to know this is the Apocalypse! Two earthquakes, what could be clearer than that? The End of Times has started!

Will the prediction of the Great Mysterioso James come true?

Pat Robertson on Haiti: Bad Theology Too!

I thought I was done with Pat Robertson, but I found this, and it's so good I just have to share it. It's a letter to the editor (the actual author is Lily Coyle of Minneapolis). Enjoy!

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I'm all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating.

I may be evil incarnate, but I'm no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth -- glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle.

Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven't you seen "Crossroads"? Or "Damn Yankees"? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there'd be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox – that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it – I'm just saying: Not how I roll.

You're doing great work, Pat, and I don't want to clip your wings – just, come on, you're making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That's working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan

What can I say? The author says it all. Not only is Pat Robertson mean spirited and ignorant of science, he also doesn't even know his theology. Who would have guessed?

Pat Robertson on Haiti: Why Religion Hates Science

Pat Robertson's idiotic claim that God caused the Haitian earthquake got me to thinking about just how much religion preys on ignorance.

Consider for a moment what Robertson is really saying. He claims God was angry about the Haitians making a pact with Satan about 250 years ago, around 1800. Now earthquakes don't just happen – it's not like God stomped on the ground really hard and everything jumped around. No, this earthquake has been brewing for ... wait a second, since 1843 when the last earthquake struck Haiti! (It killed 10,000 people. Maybe that was God's first blow against these sinners.)

But wait, there's more – it seems God screwed up. He blasted the place a couple times before the Haitians made their pact with Satan! According to Wikipedia, there was a magnitude 7.5 earthquakes in 1770, thirty years before the Haitians' pact, and another before that in 1751 that flattened the city.

In fact, it turns out God had to start his revenge on the Haitians hundreds of millions of years ago, when He created the geology of the area!

But wait a second ... it's that very geological fault that raised Haiti from the ocean floor in the first place. So if God hadn't need to get revenge, there wouldn't have been a Haiti in the first place, the French wouldn't have colonized it, killed the natives, and brought African slaves there, and they wouldn't have had to make that pact with Satan. So God's revenge is also the cause? My head is spinning.

Of all the things I dislike about religion, its reliance on ignorance is the worst. People with even a modest education in science can't stomach this Biblical literalism nonesense. It's so silly it's laugable ... except that so many people believe it.

Worse, religious leaders count on the fact that most of their followers don't understand even the most basic aspects of science. And to ensure their own survival, they actively oppose education, because they know that their superstitions will wither in the face of facts.

Robertson's childish notion of God is just an extreme view of what most religions claim: God alters the laws of physics in the universe that He created, just to reward or punish humans. Here we are, on a tiny planet. Our galaxy, the Milky Way, contains at least 200 billion stars, and there are many billions of other galaxies, which means there are an estimated nine billion trillion stars total. That's a big universe, yet God is over here in this corner, willing to change the fundamental laws of physics for the universe just because we're praying for our football team to win.

This is why religiousness falls with education, and why evangelicals are so opposed to real science. Their millenia-old ideas just can't stand up to the truth.

Unfortunately, people like Robertson prey on ignorance, and they're good at it. Education is the answer, but it will take time.

Pat Robertson, Coward, Runs From His Own Idiocy

Pat Robertson is a coward. I have a certain respect for evangelists, even the weird ones, who have the guts to say, "That's my story and I'm sticking to it!" But when they're both cruel and they don't stand behind their own words, cowardice is the right label.

Robertson's latest outrageous claim is that the horrifying Haitian earthquake, which killed as many as 50,000 innocent people, was God's retribution:

You know, Christi, something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and the people might not want talk about it. They were under the heel of the French, uh, you know, Napoleon, the third or whatever. And, they got together, and swore a pact to the devil. They said, "We will serve you, if you'll get us free from the Prince." True story. And, so, the devil said, "Ok, it's a deal," and they kicked the French out, you know, the Haitians revolted and got themselves free. But ever since, they have been cursed by one thing after another, desperately poor.

Even the White House couldn't stomach Robertson's idiocy, and called it "stupid."

But the real story is not Robertson's idiotic remark, it's his two-faced cowardice. He won't even stand behind his own words. Here's what his spokesperson, Chris Roslan had to say once the smelly stuff hit the proverbial fan:

Dr. Robertson never stated that the earthquake was God’s wrath.

This is sheer spin-doctoring. There is no doubt what Roberson's quote means: The Haitians made a pact with the devil, and to punish them, God sent this earthquake, to add to all the other misery He has caused Haiti.

Robertson, you should either shut up, or have the courage to defend your idiotic ideas. And Chris Roslan, you should stop wasting your talent defending such an immoral man.